Ivan, Underbelly's crack Alabama correspondent, is outraged. Apparently 13 students from his beloved Decatur have been suspended for (as a headline gleefully expresses it) "drinking wine in Italy."
"What are you supposed to drink in Italy?" Ivan growls. A good question, particularly considering that the story also repeats a report that some students were also suspended for drinking "only a non-alcoholic drink"--which, strictly speaking, could be "water." "Corn sugar crapola?" Ivan suggests, which is I think his pet name for Dr. Pepper.
But I'm just as intrigued by another aspect of the story. Apparently the malefactors were "suspended" to the "Center for Alternatives to Suspension, an alternative school." I.e., your suspension from school is that you have to go to school?
The story also reported that "parents have been understanding," though understanding of what it does not specify. For a good selection of Italian wines, go here. For more on corn syrup crapola, go here.