Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Sleepy Heads and Killers

Yes, this about gets it:
“There’s two kinds of brains you need to run a good business. Sometimes you need “Sleepy Heads.” You know, the ones who pick up the money from the crews; the ones who make sure everyone got ammo; the ones who just do their job, don’t cause no trouble. Then you need bona fide Killers. The Killers like watching you bleed to death while they are eating a plate of ham and collard greens. You understand?”

“What does that have to do with the financial situation?!” I asked, exasperated.

“See, by the time there’s a crisis, the Sleepy Heads are already gone. They’re the ones who keep the books, so they know where the money is, and they know when trouble starts. So they usually get out first. But at this point, in most of these companies, all you got left is the Killers. They’re the ones who like hanging around, who ain’t got no home life, who just love the blood, and the guts, who love the pain!”

“Again,” I interrupted, “what does that have to do–”

“Never lose your killers. Never let them go, because you’ll need them when things gets better. You can always get the Sleepy Heads back. They’re hiding under a rock anyway. But the Killers! Those folks are hard to find, so you got to give up the money. Pay the ones at the top, the one’s who like to smell blood. Let the Sleepy Heads go, but keep the Killers.”
In law practice, we call these guys "rainmakers." There's more, but this was the best part (link).

1 comment:

New York Crank said...

Nah, nah, nah! The "killers" ain't really killers. They're wannabes.. They're the gang that couldn't shoot straight — clowns of the Bonanno Gang variety

In a business where you're supposed to only eat what you kill, killers don't lose money. They make money.

The bozos you're talking about are the kind who hold up a liquor store and get caught because instead of taking the money out of the cash register and running, they grab the booze and start drinking it on the spot.

And I'm still — still! — pumping for making an example of all of them. Every last one. We need guillotines at every mall. America won't be happy until it sees heads bouncing.

Bring on the tumbrels!

Yours very crankily,
The New York Crank