Wednesday, June 08, 2011

Underbelly's Morning Steal: Plagiarism

Andrew Gelman says he's never done a top ten list before but I'd say his inaugural offering--on excuses for plagiarism--is so good that it deserves plagiarism republication in full here:

10. Someone snuck into my house and edited the file while I was in the shower. So sue me!

9. Out of loyalty to my hard-working graduate students, I refuse to pin the blame on them, even though it’s their fault. I take full responsibility.

8. Even a monkey typing at random, if he were to write more than 160 papers and five books, might occasionally To be or not to be, that is the qjuiosusdfu79lkjew.

7. I didn’t plagiarize them, they anticipated me!

6. If I don’t publish a new article or book this year, a puppy will die. Sorry—that’s just the way it is.

>5. Sure, I could’ve copied the original document word-for-word, but that would’ve been really boring. Also, I changed the font,

4. Nobody complained when Dr. King did it.

3. Hey—look over there! Is that a yellow-bellied sapsucker?

2. Somebody hacked my twitter account.< 1. Clippy!

The only improvement I can suggest is that he needs to work in the passive voice, as in "the deed was done" or perhaps the ever popular "sorry if someone was offended."

Afterthought:  I had completely forgotten Clippy.   But I think this guy ought to be tied to an anthill and covered with honey.

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